Blog Update - Healing the Anger and Self‑Hatred of “Not Fighting Back”

[Jamie]

Here is the requested by @Kadie

If you’ve ever struggled with anger or self‑hatred for “not fighting back” during childhood abuse, you’re not alone. Many survivors carry shame for the survival responses their bodies chose for them — freezing, staying silent, running only so far, or doing whatever it took to stay safe.

I’ve written a new article exploring why these responses happen, why they were never your fault, and how healing begins when we stop judging our younger selves through adult eyes.

https://www.havoca.org/healing-the-ange ... ting-back/

You can read the full piece here on HAVOCA.ORG — and if it resonates, you’re welcome to share your thoughts in the comments or join the conversation on our forums.

You didn’t fail. You survived.

Read the full blog here

[squidlifecrisis]

this is a great article! concise and well-worded, easy to read but effective. thank you for sharing!

“If it was my fault, then maybe I can stop it from happening again.”

ow. ow. ow. ow. ow.
bullseye.
my exact thoughts, word for word. I have believed this since grade school. every single day I have flashbacks of moments when I failed. From last week or 25 years ago. They surge back from the most innocuous, unpredictable triggers. why? my brain is fixated on preventing this shame from ever happening again. I can't escape it. It happens every day, at home, at work, relaxing with friends. it happens automatically. it's unavoidable. i cannot stop it. the anxiety controls my life.